One Saturday afternoon, representatives of Cambridge University School of Psychology's Child Development Department contacted us to inquire whether we had any young children. Well, you know how we answered. They were interested in how we were handling their early education, about which, we were happy to elaborate. So, over the summer a professor and two students came to visit us in our home and were so impressed with both Evan and Aubrie that they commissioned us to produce a series of instructional television shows aimed at teaching new parents how to maximize the overall development of their children. We are excited to share the first volume of the series, entitled: "The Parent's Guide to Raising Well Rounded Children." We hope you will enjoy the videos and find them a useful resource in your efforts at parenting.
Please be advised that this is a joke. No one from Cambridge University has ever contacted our family, especially in regard to raising children. I know nothing about language cognition development in children. I don't even know if anyone really studies that. Although, it is likely someone does and is developing all kinds of half baked theories that will be accepted as hard science within the year and thousands of young parents everywhere will be buying pacifiers that talk when you suck on them, because your child might have a 25% chance of speaking two months earlier than they otherwise would have. And after that theory is so well established, the brilliant extrapolation, that is the special province of the social sciences, will assert that this advantage will most assuredly guarantee him or her a spot at Harvard or Stanford and of course they will go on to develop an even greater invention than the talking pacifier.
